OVERCOMING LONELINESS – PART 1

Years ago, Country singer Hank Williams had a popular song out titled: [There’s a Tear in My Beer.] The lyrics to one of the verses went like this: [Last night I walked the floor; and the night before; you are on my lonely mind; It seems my life is through; And I’m so doggone blue; You are on my lonely mind; I’m going to keep on drinking; Till I can’t move a toe; And then maybe my heart; Won’t hurt me so; There’s a tear in my beer; ’cause I’m crying for you, dear; You are on my lonely mind.] The thing is that song is basically what most people think of when you mention the word [loneliness,] but there is a type of loneliness that runs much deeper than that.

What is Loneliness?

There are a number of ways we could answer this question, but for our purposes I’d like us to look at three basic answers that apply.

It is More Than Being Alone:
You can be lonely in a big family, in a big church, in the most populated city on the face of the earth. The kind of loneliness I’m describing has to do with being disconnected from other people and from YHVH, it is being in a state of mind that doesn’t involve others. It is when you live constantly live with the question: [Does anyone really care?] It is when you don’t think that anyone else could possibly relate to what you are going through and that there will probably never be a time when you will feel differently than you do right now. It is a manifested in depression, despondency and often despair. If you are in this state of mind you know exactly what I’m talking about.

It Wears Many Masks:
For some people it is very obvious to everyone around them that they are going through a deep state of loneliness what some might call [a dark night of the soul] or [wintertime of the soul]. Others who are going through this state might appear completely normal to everyone around them, even to those who know them the best. But inside they feel like everyone has deserted them, that no one can relate to what they are dealing with; not their spouse, their friends, not even YHVH and sometimes, especially YHVH.

It is a Universal Reality:
This dark experience effects young and old, rich and poor, believer, unbeliever and seeker. Einstein said once: [It is a strange phenomenon to be so universally known yet be so alone]. You might have never personally experienced it, but odds are that someday you will or at the very least you know someone else who has, or is, experiencing it now. It isn’t something to be ashamed of, laughed at or ignored, it is something to recognize, share with those who can help, pray about and lay at YHVH’s feet. That is the answer to the first question.

WHER IS YHVH IN LONELINESS?

This is a question that most of us ask deep down inside, but we don’t bring it to the surface for fear that it would seem like we don’t have enough faith. But if YHVH is Who He says He is, He already knows that we are asking the question anyway, so why not give voice to what we are feeling inside? I have asked the question myself and I have found some answers to the question.

YHVH Cares About Your Loneliness:
Whether you are able to recognize this fact right now is beside the point, you need to understand that even if your emotions are saying something different, YHVH really does care about your loneliness. One tribe of Native Americans had a unique practice for training young braves. On the night of a boy's 13th birthday, he was placed in a dense forest to spend the entire night alone. Until then he had never been away from the security of his family and tribe. But on this night, he was blindfolded and taken miles away. When he took off the blindfold, he was in the middle of thick woods, all by himself and the whole night long. Every time a twig snapped; he visualized a wild animal ready to pounce. Every time an animal howled; he imagined a wolf leaping out of the darkness. Every time the wind blew, he wondered what more sinister sound it masked. No doubt it was a terrifying night for many, after what seemed like an eternity, the first rays of sunlight entered the interior of the forest. Looking around, the boy saw flowers, trees, and the outline of the path. Then, to his utter astonishment, he beheld the figure of a man standing just a few feet away, armed with a bow and arrow. It was the boy's father; he had been there all night long!

Something very similar takes place when we feel disconnected with YHVH and others. While we are going through our dark night of the soul and it feels like no one is around to fellowship with us, to care about us or to make us feel secure. There is going to come that day when the lights come back on, and we will find that YHVH has been there with us all along. [Adonai YHVH said: It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a companion who will help him. -- Genesis 2:18. This word translated [companion] literally means [a corresponding partner.] It is interesting to me that YHVH doesn’t say that being in a relationship with Him should take care of the loneliness problem, instead He sends other people who can fill the gap, in other words, it is not only a relationship with YHVH that will make the difference but relationships with other people are necessary also. YHVH cared enough about Adam to send him Eve, who has He sent to you?

Yeshua Understands Your Loneliness:
In the midst of your disconnectedness, why not call Yeshua along to be your Companion while you go through the experience? If anyone knows what you feel like, it is Yeshua. [This High Priest of ours understands our weaknesses, for He faced all of the same temptations we do, yet He did not sin.] -- Hebrews 4:15. Could one of those weaknesses that Yeshua understands be the loneliness we feel? Yes, it could, and it was, when He was on the Cross, when the Son faced the darkest hour in all of eternity. [At noon, darkness fell across the whole land until three o'clock. Then, at that time Yeshua called out with a loud voice: -- Eloi, Eloi, lema sabachthani? -- which means, {My YHVH, My YHVH, why have You forsaken Me?}] -- Mark 15:33-34. Yeshua was abandoned, if only momentarily, by YHVH the Father, it had to be so. Yeshua was abandoned by His own disciples as they deserted Him. Yeshua was abandoned by His own people, the nation of Israel. If anyone can relate to what you’re feeling, it is Yeshua who spent much of His human experience being disconnected and abandoned by the people around Him.

Yeshua Invites You Into a Relationship With Him:
So many of us, when we feel despondent, run from Yeshua rather than run to Him. Yeshua said: [Come to Me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens and I will give you rest. Take My Yoke upon you. Let Me teach you, because I am humble and gentle, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke fits perfectly and the burden I give you is light.] -- Matthew 11:28-30. Notice these two adjectives Yeshua uses; He is humble, and He is gentle. Rather than a god who stands with His arms crossed and points His finger at us, here we find that He comes down to our level and welcomes us into His Presence. [Look! Here I stand at the door and knock. If you hear Me calling and open the door, I will come in and we will share a meal as friends.] -- Revelation 3:20. Yeshua is waiting for us to invite Him in; it’s up to us to decide if we are going to open up the door.

When You Belong to Yeshua, You Belong to His Family:
[So, it is with Moshiach's Body. We are all parts of His One Body, and each of us has different work to do. And since we are all One Body in Moshiach, we belong to each other, and each of us needs all the others.] -- Romans 12:5. Two words really stand out to me here: [belong] and [needs]; to belong means that I am a part of something much bigger than myself; the Kingdom of YHVH, especially as expressed through TTN and your own gatherings. But this word need, stands out to me even more; what else in life could I say that I need? I need food, shelter and security but according to this passage I also need all of the rest of you who make up the Body of Moshiach.