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"Neighbor" is confusing to me. Am i supposed to love someone who intentionally deprives me of sleep just because she lives above me? Or is neighbor supposed to mean cultural brethren? Both? I have been living under this demon posessed woman for 10 years now. I tried being neighborly and friendly in the beginning, but she has become very abusive. She has spit in my face, deprived me of sleep, cursed me, lied to me, lied about me, stolen from me, deprived my daughter of sleep, etc. Is there a point when we can give up on someone and stand up for ourselves? The landlord hasnt done much about her. The police arrested her once for disordeely conduct, but now shes off probation & her medications and repeating the offenses. I have had to cleanse this property of her demons numerous times. She invites them right back in. It is really wearing on me. Sleep deprivation is what they think caused my heart attack last year at age 47. Im not a person sleep comes easy for anyway. When i do manage to sleep, she intentionally wakes me up, usually once an hour. Im taking many medications to get to sleep faster, stay relaxed, sleep deeper, but she still wakes me up. I have tried the spiritual route, the legal route, the medical route, the neighborly route (not in that order). I dont know what else to do to protect myself. Any advice? Shalom & thank you!

Comment

Certainly not an easy situation.
I can only say the the church notion of love is not the biblical idea of live. It’s not feeling kindly toward someone or even being friendly and nice. Love is acting toward them in accordance with the commandments. But that leaves a lot of room. Neighbor is mostly a cultural thing and the commands don’t usually take into account living in exile.
Personal I’d be moving anywhere but there.
But if you have to stay, live isn’t cuddly, fluffy or even comfy at all. And when someone is physically trying to harm you, Torah does not forbid self defence.

· 1714856015

4 Replies

Your options are fight (lawfully) or flight; both are biblical, but you must determine the cost-benefit ratio. A bully will continue to abuse you until you make the cost too high. Gather as many allies as possible; there is strength in numbers. An attorney or private detective might give you more leverage, but if she is irrational, she may not stop and may become violent before you can get her evicted, committed, or incarcerated.

If I were in your situation, I would ask God to show me why He is allowing this and what I'm supposed to learn. Assertiveness is a godly trait; being passive or aggressive isn't. I'd also ask God to keep His promises found in Ps 34:19, Ps 50:15, and 1Cor 10:13.

· 1714922526

3 Replies

The term neighbour has been on my mind for the past 8 years and as Caleb mentioned, I also now see it as a cultural term where the expectation is that a person lives within a group of like-minded people.

Love your neighbour also goes both ways, so within such a culture there wouldn't be need to have to deal with any such matters for long as everyone will care for the people near them.

I see that keeping a grudge comes after an attempt to make right has taken place by the offender. If the situation has been corrected and the offender tries to fix the relationship and I then push them away then I am holding a grudge. Till that point, I don't understand it to be a grudge. But please correct me if I am wrong.

If the person or their animal is in need of help then I should step up and help with love. Best case it will heal our relationship, worst case it heaps coals on their heads...

Rick makes a good point about fight or flight.

You could even use a noice meter on your phone to record the dB and send that to your landlord... Here in the UK no noise is allowed after 11pm so if a person repeatedly ignores that law then they will be reported and the police will most often respond (we are very civil over here 😉). I don't know if you have similar laws that you can fall back on.

· 1715073287

2 Replies

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